Sunday, March 30, 2008

A Crazy Saturday, Part 2: The Kids Choice Awards...Seriously

After I helped destroy Blake's kitchen, I rushed home to clean up and get dressed up to attend the 2008 Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards. Yes, that's right, the Kids Choice Awards. Normally, I'm not invited to such "high class" events, but Heather's brother, Mark, has done some host work for Nickelodeon, and this year, he and his co-host, Ryan, were doing live coverage of the pre-show, Orange Carpet event for Nick as well as their website. He hooked Heather and I up with tickets, so we, of course, were going to watch and try to fit in with the pre-pubescent crowd.

When we arrived, we immediately began searching for Mark near the Orange Carpet. Luckily we had badges for "Nick Talent," so basically, we could go wherever we wanted to. As we searched for Mark, someone pointed us to the front of the Orange Carpet where the "Talent Sign In" was. At that desk, a woman told us that we were welcome to walk the Orange Carpet in hopes of meeting up with Mark. There was no questioning whether we were famous/talented/belonged and there was no security to stop us: we were "Nick Talent" according to our passes and that meant we could walk wherever we wanted.

So Heather and I began this bizarre walk down the Orange Carpet. At first, it resembled the 10 at rush hour: logjammed. But as we rounded a corner, it was obvious why there was a human traffic jam: we were now about to walk down paparazzi lane.

The first person I saw was Christian Siriano from this season's Project Runway. He was on the other side of the fence, doing interviews for Access Hollywood. As I was watching him, I realized that he was interviewing Jodie Foster. It was a "fierce-hot-tranny-mess" moment if I ever saw one. Moments later, I turned around, and Shia LeBouf was standing right behind Heather and I. He was clearly uncomfortable with the insane amount yelling and screaming press, and I understand why. Heather was thrilled to see him - not because she's a fan, but because she now knows that she's taller than Shia. As we continued down the carpet, we wandered past Abigail Breslin, Chris Brown, Akon, and other people who appeared to be celebrities that I didn't recognize.

As we got towards the end of the press row, there was a "Slime Pit" for the main Nick pre-show, as well as bleachers for the kids to watch the celebs come down the carpet. We happened to walk into this area just as the Jonas Brothers did. (I was slightly familiar with the Jonas Brothers - I don't know their music, but I do know that they're massively popular with kids.) As they walked onto the stage, and Heather and I walked past the bleachers, the kids roared and screamed as if the Beatles had just walked up. It was piercing. And scary. I got a close look at these young boys, and despite the fact that they're prepped by stylists and coaches, it's very clear that they're still in that awkward stage of teenage life. I can't imagine being in that phase of my life and having that kind of attention thrown upon me.

Anyway, just a few steps away, Mark and his co-host, Ryan were doing their live pre-show. Luckily, we were able to stand to the side and watch as they did interviews with a bunch of celebs (we saw them talk with Nelly, Abigail Breslin, the Jonas Bros, Ashley Simpson, some Nickelodeon stars that I didn't know). I couldn't hear a word, but they looked like they were having a blast and everyone around them seemed to have a blast.

Mark and Ryan doing their thing

Talking with Nelly

As they were interviewing some celebs, even bigger ones were walking by, within a foot of Heather and I: Usher, Will Smith, Cameron Diaz, Pete Wentz and the lead singer of Fall Out Boy, Brendan Fraser, Rhiana, etc. It was very surreal to see all of them so close.
Cameron Diaz looked uber hot in person
Before you call me a perv, Heather's the one who took the picture of Cameron's legs.
Heather and Mark at the carpet

So we finally went inside and watched the awards show, which was amusing, but clearly aimed at those under the age of 13. The set, as you can see, was impressive. Our seats were decent.
Steve Carrell and Amy Poehler

One of the biggest things of the night was the presence of Miley Ray Cyrus, aka Hannah Montana. The first time they announced her name, it was bedlam. They were screaming like crazy and it sounded like a plane was landing. I had to cover my ears. It really was amazing. Here's a brief, earsplitting video. Make sure you turn it up as loud as possible.

After the show, we went to the after party. They put up a massive tent and thousands of kids were running around. For them, it was paradise. For us, it was a bit too much: they had music blasting, a dance floor, hairdressers set-up to paint kids hair and style it, basketball hoops, and other crazy loud stuff. The food was clearly not for adults: Burger King, pizza, mac and cheese, and make your own Sundae tables all over.
Thanks to Mark, we were able to sneak into the VIP tents. Jack Black was hanging out, signing autographs. Ice Cube (?!?) was sitting at a table, chatting up some people. I talked with Tom Kenny (aka, the voice of SpongeBob and a former Mr. Show star) for a few minutes. Kids were more interested in getting Mark's autograph than seeing Ice Cube. It was a very surreal scene.

It was a pretty great experience. As we kept going through this, Heather and I kept looking at each other, and asking, "Is this real?" I guess it is. I can't imagine doing this every week or every month, but doing it once in a while would be alright by me.

A Crazy Saturday, Part 1: SEEK AND DESTROY!

I got an email from Blake the other day: he's re-doing his kitchen and needed some help doing demo work. I am not known as a guy who likes doing manual labor, but throw in a sledgehammer and a crowbar, and I can be convinced to join in on the fun.

Of course, I said yes, and I had a BLAST destroying Blake's old kitchen. Actually, it seemed like we all enjoyed breaking things a little too much. If you've had a frustrating week of work, I highly suggest spending a few hours doing demo work: it really helps you release that tension.

Blake's doing a blog about his kitchen over here. But, really, you should check out this link to see a few more pictures and a great time-lapse of the destruction that Patry did.
I became obsessed with taking out the tiling and the counter. Well, actually, it was just pretty satisfying to bash the tiles and break them into powder. A Crazy Saturday, Part 2, coming tomorrow...

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Saturday, March 22, 2008

For Video Game Nerds...

Thanks to Tivo, I usually don't sit through commercials, but I've been watching a lot of NCAA basketball this week and saw this awesome commercial. If you played the game Spy Hunter back in the 80's, you'll appreciate it:

Monday, March 17, 2008

Karate Monkey

I fucking love the internet.

Friday, March 14, 2008


I watched this video, and my life changed. Maybe for better. Maybe not.

Wow. Fucking wow.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

My short!!

Hey everyone, I'm proud to finally present the short I've been working on:

(Okay, it's not really my short...and as much as I want to believe this is real, I think it's a comedy bit. But it still makes me laugh.)

Saturday, March 01, 2008

Dubbing Fun

I'm watching Wedding Crashers on TBS because nothing else is on. Vince Vaughn just got slapped and yelled out, "CHEESE AND RICE!" I guess you can't say Jesus Christ on TBS. He also said, "I don't give a BAKER'S FLAKE!" I have no idea what that means.